It's All In The Numbers

Riteaid stores have this thing called higi, a health and wellness kiosk that measures and records certain health data through a procedure that only takes 15 minutes. It records the blood pressure, pulse, weight, and body mass index of an individual.

When I first moved back to Hampton in 2014, I sat down at the kiosk for the first time and recorded my numbers. At that time, my weight was 142 lbs and my BMI was 24.42, normal weight. Two years later, I recorded my numbers and my weight then was 162 lbs with my BMI increased by 3.55 to 27.98. I was now officially categorized as overweight. Oh my.

Note that the weight gain occurred in the years I was working big-box retail. I was a depressive sloth with a strange schedule who had learned how to stress-eat my feelings until I finally escaped that job.

So, now, two more years later; after reaching a high of 170 lbs at 5'4" tall, my exercise routine has me holding steady at 165 lbs. So, I did keep gaining but not at the pace of that first increase and I am currently walking approximately seven miles a week outdoors in this southern heat. So, I'm doing pretty good.

My wardrobe has suffered. As I find things no longer fit or are no longer comfortable, I've been moving them over to one side of my closet. That side is now taking over! So many lovely things that I can no longer wear....

My exercise routine has to increase, despite this heat. I need to take my diet more seriously, eating less is not producing the weight loss, like I hoped. It also isn't that enjoyable. I need to also research more on anti-bloat foods (low FODMAP*) because my stomach is frequently betraying me when I start to think I can wear something cute again. Suggestions about that are very welcome.

One bright light I found is Rini Frey aka @ownitbabe on Instagram. I appreciate her philosophy about accepting your own body and not being too hard on yourself. It has helped.

* Look at the good-to-eat list first, most things can still be enjoyed, just in moderation.

Some New Tasks

A few years ago, I wrote a post about coming to terms with weight gain but never published it. Over time, I've thought to revise it but then something else would come up. However, I have decided to post it as is and leave the numbers and measurements as they were. The issue is much more a part of my life now as I meet the crossroads of losing some age-related weight gain (10-15 lbs) or making new clothes for the new size. But that would be a lot of clothes!

Depending on the day of the week I only have three pairs of pants that fit, two of them are jeans. Only a few skirts truly fit, then there are a few that are nearing unacceptable tightness (I don't believe a straight skirt should cup all under your butt. Sorry, not sorry.) Then there are dresses and tops which fit awkwardly tight around my upper arms and bust. Having thought myself small-busted the majority of my life it was a shock to find myself recently having to attach snaps between buttons on a top to stop gaping! When did I become this busty, what is going on here?

Worst of all, my winter coats can not be fastened over my hips, totally defeating their keeping me warm purposes. However, I must mention that they are both over 15 years old, 'cause coats are expensive, y'all! So thinking of the clothes I just mentioned and the possibility of replacing them all, losing the weight saves me the most money and sewing time. But how to go about it? I've been thin (sometimes too thin) most of my life and living off a high metabolism and junk food for all that time. This is going to be so hard.

I have started taking advantage of my job being situated in a park with its own 5-mile walking trail. I'm doing 1-2 miles every other day to start. This started on a whim without proper shoes or clothes so I was a disgusting, sweaty, and hobbling mess each time. However, I was being entertained and edified by awesome podcasts such as Buffering the Vampire Slayer, Hidden Brain, and Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard. Since I believe I can keep this up,* I invested in some supportive walking shoes and some wicking fabric.

New Balance 635 V2 running shoe

I will, of course, reevaluate my diet and while I'm changing my body composition I will simultaneously learn how to properly fit my body. Yes, I will be taking new accurate measurements and developing slopers for tops and bottoms so my new body will be well taken care of!

In the meantime, I may do a little sewing, perhaps the Grainline Morris, finally!! Maybe some tanks and underwear, since I have so many knit scraps and recently invested in some affordable fold-over elastic. Also I have a few baby shower gifts to produce.

However, my next few posts will be on the exciting and interesting measuring and sloper process...

* I just don't allow myself to leave the work parking lot until I've done some walking.

Battle of the Bulge

WOW, I really didn't mean to disappear for so long! It was a combination of illness and procrastination. I also had a few mending projects to do for a friend, and then made a spectacularly failed UFO.  In fact, that UFO revealed a problem that I apparently had been ignoring for quite a while.

A few months ago, I had to buy a new pair of work pants because I had outgrown the first ones. The thighs were straining and the stitches were about to give up! I also, for the first time experienced my thighs rubbing together when wearing my summer skirts. I was SO not happy.

Since I moved here two years ago, apparently I have gained a large amount of weight and didn't really notice. To put it the only way I can at the moment, I found out that I am now 11 and a half stone. A stone, a unit of weight measure in Britain, Ireland, and Australia; is equivalent to 14 American pounds. It's just easier for me to say it in stones. This is 15 lbs more than when I was weighed 2 years ago.

I was a very thin child in my teens and always susceptible to anemia. In high school, I hated being skinny and in particular did not like my arms. Around that time, I became aware of female bodybuilders like Rachel McLish, Carla Dunlap, Cory Everson, and Gladys Portugues through the 1985 documentary Pumping Iron II: The Women and that resulted in a subscription to Strength Training for Beauty (1984-86) magazine. I ended up purchasing an 110 pound weight set and remember arriving at college with what could be called a decent "six pack."

More than 20 years later, I am now battling a tummy and love handles, along with the aforementioned rubbed thighs and some unattractive underarm flab. There was a warning sign last May when I tried on this muslin and saw this:

 

I noticed I was bustier than I had ever been and had a visible roll of blubber right below my belly button. That was a year ago and obviously I have gained more weight since then. As a result, my body image is completely different than it has been for the past 95% of my life. This is hard to reconcile. 

My measurements have obviously changed but in cutting out my last sewing project, Simplicity 6145, I hadn't grasped that fact yet. While I altered the bodice of Simplicity 6145, combining it with the fit of the Grainline Scout, I still thought I would need to engage some darts in the back to accommodate my swayback. Trying on the basted muslin was such a shock! I could barely shimmy it on. I had not once thought of enlarging the waist area and below. 

So for the last few weeks, I have put off sewing and more importantly taking new measurements for the future. I have succeeded in losing 5 pounds somehow and would love to know that I could remove the other ten just as stealthily but alas diet and exercise must rear their heads for that to happen. I seriously could handle getting used to this "new me" however, I have a wardrobe of delicious clothing that I can't afford to replicate or that have adequate seam allowances for me to alter to fit.

So my dilemma is: sew new clothes in the new size or wait and see? What would you do?

What Dailyburn.com Has Taught Me...

about myself.

Exactly four weeks ago, when I was taking my little blog break, I decided to conduct an experiment. It seems, within the course of a few weeks I had been seeing a lot about gluten* intolerance and it's symptoms. I found more than just a few of them seemed to describe different things going on with me, so I decided to try to pin it down. Besides a blood test done at the doctor's office, another way to find out is to eliminate gluten from your diet for a month to see if the symptoms subside.

I did a bit of research; I even started another blog which I have since abandoned (see why further on) and found out what items from my prior diet I could still eat and what I would need to buy and eat during this period.

Now this is where I try to let you know just how much this here girl loves bread and wheat-made products; from cooked oats, Cream of Wheat (Duh!!), barley, and whole grain products. To find out one must avoid these things, including cakes, pies, and most CUPCAKES was a daunting thing. However, most of these can be replaced by products made with rice and other grains AND I did find the most delicious cupcakes ever, gluten-free or not. (Shout out to the moist, dense, coconut cupcakes with luscious cream cheese frosting made by 3 Fellers Bakery in Goochland, VA!)

I first started out listing my daily food intake in the new blog, but really wanted the calorie information included. That led me to dailyburn.com, where I could search for my usual food items or enter the dietary information for the items that were not already in their database. After doing this, I didn't want to duplicate the same information into the blog, so I ended up scrapping the blog pretty quickly.

Using dailyburn taught me a few things about my eating habits. Most importantly, I found out that I don't eat enough; rarely making it to 1,000 calories a day, and when I did it was only because I ate half a bag of potato chips or something else high fat and unhealthy. I sometimes exceeded the carbohydrates or fat I should be consuming per day; however, I was always far below the amount of protein that I needed daily. No wonder I felt sluggish and tired all the time, my body wasn't getting enough nutrients to create any energy.

It was shocking to find out that on a regular basis I've only eaten about 800 calories a day when the normal calorie count recommended in order to maintain my weight would be 1600 to 1800 calories a day! I also frequently skip breakfast. So, I definitely believe that the body can go into "starvation mode" and hold on to calories and pounds. Because despite this calorie deficit I've been under for months , I hadn't noticed any weight loss which it seems I should have experienced having effectively cut what is considered a normal calorie count in half! Not that I want to lose any weight, but presumably my metabolism is now so extremely slow because of this (and my sedentary lifestyle), that my body is not letting go of anything!

So this is what I need to work on:

EAT breakfast!
Add more protein to my diet on a daily basis
Take my daily vitamin daily
Eat more vegetables (a rare occurrence, unless I eat out) and fruit
Get some exercise
Drink more water ( I've been recording only 2-3 glasses a day.)
Develop a consistent sleep pattern. Instead of falling into bed after midnight and having an understandably hard time getting up in the morning (after thoroughly exhausting all of the snooze options at my command)

* Gluten is a form of protein found in many grains, such as wheat, barley, and rye.

Misc.

Updates:

• Finally finished stuffing two Wee Wonderful dolls. Their faces have to be sewn on tomorrow night as at least one will be delivered on Saturday at a baby shower.
• At said baby shower, I will be wearing my New York & Co. dress for the first time with my cordovan Clarks. Of course, I will try to get a picture for the blog.
• Spent some of last night hand sewing the hem on that "quick & easy" gray skirt. I shortened it four inches after I couldn't stand feeling frumpy in it. I wanted to wear it today so a quick sewing machine hem was done but as time goes by I will hand sew the hem bit by bit. The Philip Lim-inspired sash was finished a few days ago.
• My belly dance class is going great!
• Doctor's appointment #1 went well and I have a mammogram scheduled for Monday.
• Will try to get to the Anda dress. It is ridiculous that a simple dress like that is still not done. I just haven't had time to check the fit on me.
  
  
• If I opened an Etsy shop, selling different sewn accessory items and a few key clothing pieces, what do you think I should call it?
  

Update: Positive

Well, I had my belly dance class on Tuesday and I loved it! I was worried that I was really rusty since I hadn't used some of those muscles for five years. But no, I was keeping up with the other girls who had taken it last session. Two days later and I'm still not sore so my muscles must be pretty good. I had so much energy the next day. So yeah, this exercise thing is really going to help me out.

I finally finished my taxes and I will be getting back a check for more money than I make in a month! Of course, I don't make that much in a month, but still..."it's a good thing," as Martha would say. This will also help me out immensely.

I have many projects on my plate right now, so I'm doing a little bit each night:

• two stuffed animals for one newborn and one upcoming baby shower
• a musical keyboard cover for a friend in exchange for some computer help
• that Burdastyle Anda dress (just haven't had time to do anything past sewing up the side seams)
• make a sash for that gray skirt (though I did take out that 2nd row of elastic that was making me feel thick in the waist)
• other misc. mending jobs (hems, repair tears, replace buttons and other fasteners)

Let's just say, TGIF, TGIF!


Victoria Secret chandelier sandals I always associate with belly dancing. I so wish I had bought these years ago! (Now, I'd feel guilty having such an impractical pair of shoes.)

Need an energy boost

Yesterday: I did a major Holly Hunter-Broadcast News* cry today on the way to a baby shower. Not good. Had attempted to complete some baby booties in time, but did not succeed.

 Update: Made bootie progress!

Today: Going to try on that New York & Co dress again (hey, it makes me feel good and maybe it will be on sale!) AND drop by Anthropologie for some free inspiration.

Update: I was stopped by the snow.

Monday: Must make appointments to see some body & mind doctors (long overdue New Year's goals) and sign up for a belly dance class for some needed social interaction and exercise. I met the instructor yesterday at the aforementioned baby shower. Hopefully, the doctors will work with me on my lethargy, nutrition, and depression issues and things can start looking up.

Update: Everything above was closed but I left messages and will call again tomorrow. To make up for this though, I did start my taxes online.

*After seeing the above-linked clip I remember how much I love that movie! Must see again soon.

Patience is a power

Six months ago:

An excerpt from a never-posted entry entitled "I want a new life":

This one, well, I can't seem to get it to go anywhere. I moved here full of vim and vigor four years ago. Now, no vim, no vigor. I'm in debt, out of work, and because I can't pay for more classes, my school loans are now due.

Four years ago, I had everything going for me. I was eager and motivated. In February, I quit my soul-sucking job (my 3rd!) to attend school full-time and get a part-time job. I had enough money in loans to finish my degree, buy a laptop, and perhaps help out on paying for my graduation trip to Italy. That is, if I had gotten that part-time job. Well, I didn't and therefore went through the money much faster. Now I'm hoping that the last interview I went on worked.

Depressing, right?

Now:

• Thursday I finished my last class and last exam for the spring semester. School is officially out for summer! I feel like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders and even the load that was weighing on that weight was lifted. That one was full of guilt about not doing the other stuff I wanted to accomplish while working 40 hours, taking two classes, publishing my two blogs, and writing a column for another blog. You know, keeping in touch with your existing friends, making new friends, and perhaps having a date before 2010.
• I got on the scale Friday morning (and double-checked just now) somehow, since the last time I got on the scale, I have gained FIVE pounds! Woo hoo! This accomplishment means so much more than numbers. For the past year, I have been in survivor mode with no appetite, my clothes falling off me, and no energy because of anemia and insomnia. This weight gain means I am finally rallying from that depressive year of unemployment, 2007. Finally.
• I checked my account balance and there is cushion money in both checking and in savings thanks to my tax refunds! In addition, I finally made the goal of $100 through blog advertising revenue and will be receiving my first check before the end of the month! This doesn't mean I'm swimming in money just yet but I can now start saving for the fall semester without starving.

So what I'm trying to say...is prepare to start seeing dispatches from "the summer of Lisa" this next few months...I'm feeling energized!

No wonder I'm so tired...

I just found out why I have no energy despite my new walking routine. I am anemic and in need of iron.

That explains why all of my studying done in private ends up being an impromptu nap. It seems I can only get my reading done out of my house and if I stay on campus all day. Well, with this weather that we are having here (in the 30's) I'm fine with that. So tomorrow I will only walk there and back once. Hopefully these vitamins will kick in fast.

So Out of Shape

I had no idea how out of shape I was in until last Wednesday. With my new schedule I do a lot of walking.

I signed up for campus parking late so I didn't get space in a lot on campus. My lot is about four blocks from my classrooms, which also makes it about three blocks from my apartment. So I end up practically walking all the way to class everyday.

So why did I pay over $100 for a spot in a lot? My apartment is in a commercial district so I am only allowed to park in the same spot for two hours at a time. So buying a spot that my car can stay in all day without bother was worth it.

On last Tuesday, the first day of classes, I drove to the lot and walked to my first class. My second class is just an hour after that class so I just stayed and ate lunch on campus. But after that class I walked home and got to be there for about three hours, ate my dinner, and then started out for my night class. Well even though I also have to walk to a class on Wednesday afternoon, the muscles didn't start screaming until Thursday when I started the walk back to campus for my last class of the week. WOW. Not only were my legs getting a workout but my heart and lungs were too, especially with the cold weather. The heart was pumping and the lungs were working harder just to get me through the cold. Believe me, I was not that happy when the temperature dropped far enough for it to snow. My next step should be to get a large and reliable travel thermos for hot tea or cider.

I also noticed that even though it is winter time, I'm now getting more sun exposure than ever. Because of my walking I am getting at least a half hour of exposure on Tues, Weds, & Thurs. (Yeah, it doesn't sound like much, but figure out how much true exposure you get to the sun during the weekday, not counting the time driving in your car. Sad, right?) Well, this is definitely helping my S.A.D. quotient and I am finally getting some of that Vitamin D that is produced through sunlight. Add these two things (sun, aerobic activity) to less stress from the job, and perhaps I can also start putting back some of the weight I lost (from the above work stress) and stop my hair from falling out. The hair and weight things are my most consistent signs of when I need to move away from something that is causing me more harm than good. In the past, my body has alerted me to toxic friendships, sucky job situations, and unsuccessful relationships. I trust it.